The Japanese Version of the Office: Episode 1

So, I have given my two weeks notice and in my final days of working in a Japanese office, I would like to present "The Japanese Version of the Office" staring me, Erin. (note: the camera is the window, and i look at it often)

Episode 1: Calandar Girls

I work in the Internation Programs Office, and we often recieve random "international" items in the mail (advertisements for programs, world culture events, newspapers... etc.) Well today, a HUGE calandar comes in the mail, titled "Japanese Airlines: A World of Beauty" we open it up assuming it will be the typica "world photos" but no.... apparently, according to Japanese Airlines, "World of Beauty" = "scantily clad women of Asia looking at the camera" So one of my coworkers holds up the calandar and shows everyone:

coworker 1: ohhhh! Sexual Harrassment!!!

coworker 2-5: whooaaa!! we can't hang that up in here!? what do we do with it...

(coworker stops showing people)

coworker 2: wait, which one is japan?

coworker 3: yeah! find japan!

(calandar gets paged through like a business presentation, we get to november)

coworker 2: what? there is no japan??

(we get to december)

coworker 3: THERE'S JAPAN!!!

(woman in Kimono and white face makeup)

coworker 1: What the hell? there is NO ONE like that in Japan! There is not ONE WOMAN in Japan who looks like that! What the hell!

(and the calandar gets thrown away...)

subplots:

1. The big boss compares English education to the atomic bomb (with no explaination)

2. Big boss keeps using this one phrase in speeches, have no idea what he means in his context, so I wikipedia it and get: "The phrase has been abused in "marketing speak", and is often considered a meaningless buzzword in this context. This is now so widespread that Larry Trask lists it in his book Mind The Gaffe as a phrase never to use, and he advises caution when reading anything that contains this phrase."

3. the following conversation occurs:

sup: i need you to translation this revision into English, I included a sample from a previous document.

me: ok

sup: only, the previous document is a totally different type of agreement, and the revision you need to write is nothing like this sample.

me: ......... alright

sup: so, what you write should be absolutely nothing like this sample.

me: i see...

sup: and the sample is in french.

me: (look at window)

5. a very pregnant praying mantis spends 40 minutes climbing up and down the giant window next to my desk, looking for a place to lay her eggs.